We’re beautiful now!

We’re beautiful now!

Hey guys!

I feel a bit guilty for not updating this blog as I want to but as many of you already know I have been spending my evenings/nights talking to this guy I like and he likes me back! I have been lost in my own little world. Yes it’s the guy from my English class who I became friends with the last month of the course when he helped me with my essay which I got 19/20 points.

I didn’t see him more than a classmate because I was not looking for a fling or anything. We started to talk casually and later got to know each other on a deeper level and I don’t know why but it felt safe. He understood me and not once did he ever judge me on some things that I told him, no instead he was supportive and gave me a speech that I need to sort things out instead of avoiding them. He also told me lots of thing too about his life and his issues. We talked for hours online but in classes we were acting normal without people knowing about our new friendship. We are NOTHING a like, he is a guy who many can see as rude and full of himself which I also thought in the beginning but it’s so much more to it.

We all had a week off for studying for the exams so I decided to study with him so we spent some time together at the library just him and I. During study sessions I started to notice the way he looked at me in the “special” kind of way and asked if I had changed the color of my nails, which I didn’t. I had to remind him that we were friends indirectly. One day we had some “discussion/argument” online over a thing and he said something like: Of course I want to listen, I really care for you (which he normally doesn’t do), so I asked if he liked me which he said did. I told him a secret and he took it really well to my surprise and I think at that moment my feelings changed.

I had not felt ANYTHING for more than 3 years and now he came out of nowhere and said all the right things. Now I got confused because it’s such a bad timing since I might study abroad for my Master’s and I didn’t want to hurt him or myself. One day I told that I liked him too but that it’s not a good idea and he was aware of the “problem”.

We met each other one day before the exam and went for long a walk and just talked, we sat by the water and I started to talk about some things from the past and other thing, he was just quiet and listening to me talking for 20 minutes. When I stopped I asked him to say something so he started to say things which were true and I just looked down and listened. I got little upset when we started to go back so he came and gave me a hug, it felt really nice to hold him and know that he cared. He is a completely other person with me, I have hard to believe that it’s the same guy who always had to be right in class or got the “I want to kill you” look from others. I didn’t care because he showed me a soft and sweet side of himself and he is not a bad guy. Ever since classes ended we have been talking every day online till 3-4 AM and talked on the phone.

He is the kind of guy who calls me beautiful and sexy every time we talk, he says I have gorgeous eyes and lips, that I am smart and kind. I know that he wants to be with me but I am the one who is stopping it because I still don’t know what the plans are for next semester. I’m afraid! I do care for him deeply but there are some things in our lives that need to be fixed and right now is maybe not the best time. But I hope that I will find out soon what to do. He makes me smile anyways and I know that he is going to be there for me no matter what will happen. I wanted to share this with you since he has become a part of my life now even though we are close friends at the moment. I never thought it could happen especially with him.

Now you know little more on what’s going on haha!

– Hugs x heart –

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15 thoughts on “We’re beautiful now!

      1. You are right my dear friend! I am just feeling down today that’s all because I’m afraid. It’s been 4 years since I felt something for someone. Thank you so much for the support ! Hugs

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    1. Aw that’s so sweet Rob! I have been on an emotional rollercoaster the past month. Yesterday we had an argument till 5 AM and he was really annoyed. I have been feeling down all day and I don’t blame hin to feel that way. He is not like guys I have met before but we are too different and have others thoughts and background. My feelings are all over the place 😦

      Liked by 1 person

  1. Being different isn’t always necessarily a negative attribute in a relationship. Relatively, you each play off each others strength and fill in the gapes where your partners falls short. Ultimately, I and all of your readers just want you to be happy. Lots of love to you! ❤
    Michelle

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yes I agree with you! A relationship should also be about meeting in the middle and at this moment he wants space and that we talk less. It’s been two days without talking and it feel so strange but I respect him. I can’t do anything else can’t I? I know you want me happy and that’s the sweetest thing ever ❤ Love you!!!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Well yeah, it’s two people being together as one. I don’t really know? If he doesn’t want to talk then he may just want his own space and isn’t ready for anything? But I don’t know him 😕 I suppose it’s something you have to figure out, do you wait for him to figure it out or maybe it’s not the right time or the right fit? Love and relationships have many shapes and forms. Love you too! ❤

        Liked by 1 person

      2. You are so right and I have some serious thinking to do because I don’t just invest my feelings in anyone and it has to feel right in the long run which I to be honest don’t see in this guy. I think he cares more about me than me about him. I want to invest in someone who I can see a future with and not just a fling. Thank you for your comment! I will answer your mail soon :* Hope you have a great Saturday! ❤ Love to you!

        Liked by 1 person

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